Lifeless and Smelly
A man with no life had a plan,
To live his whole life in a van.
But his life became hell
Once it started to smell,
So he bathed in the
Sorry, its not good, but there is no way I'm killing off both main characters!
When Brownie began to walk back
The queen’s guard started giving him flak.
Brownie took out his gun,
And the battle was won,
Because guards don’t know how to attack.
Sorry, you have to wait till tommorow to see what the "secret plan" is.
Then Brownie came up with a plan.
As they drove along in their sedan.
When he told it to Kit,
His old cat had a fit,
And he stopped him before it began!
I'm liking the idea of the man and his cat, but I need a couple of good names that will fit in meter. Got suggestions?
When the man and his cat drove away,
the sky turned from sunny to gray.
But what they didn’t know,
Was that ten years ago,
Queen Elizabeth wore a toupee!
Sorry, I fell asleep at my computer last night, and didn't post it.
The Real 16th President
Abraham Lincoln was yelling
On this fact his wife was still dwelling.
She said, “Abe never shouts,
He just sits and he pouts.
I wish he was not so compelling!”
This is dedicated to Homer and his epic poem, "The Odyssey" and the essay I had to write about it. NOTE: I did not abide by the rules stated, nor did I receive the punishment!
When writing an essay for school.
Abide by the number one rule.
That almighty law,
States, “you must wear a bra,
Or else you’ll be forced to eat stool.”
A homeowner looked at his yard.
And found out that it had been marred.
As he thought about why
He exclaimed with a sigh,
“Now my beautiful yard has been scarred!”
The Eskimos’ igloo was icky.
His carpet was covered in whiskey.
On the previous night,
There had been a large fight,
He also was robbed by Ms. Vicky.
If you haven't noticed, I'm taking the suggestion of a reader and going down the alphabet with my limerick titles. Thanks for the suggestion. (I can't wait for "X" and "Q"). i was thinking of adding small pictures to poems also. what do you think? Please comment.
Boris the Blacksmith
Boris the blacksmith was flying.
And gravity he was defying.
But then out of the blue,
Something shaped like a shoe
Bopped old’ Boris and he started crying.
The Annoying Child
A child was feeling distraught.
He felt all his deeds were for naught.
When his father asked why
He exclaimed with a sigh,
“All the kids at school think I am snot!”
I hope you like it. Its not my greatest limerick, but, you know what they say: "Every poet has their day." or something along those lines!
The Elderly Man
The elderly man was a grump.
His belly was also quite plump.
But when John came to town
The hunkered down frown
Became something that looked like a hump.
My passion for limericks accrues.
But I still need to look for my muse.
If you know where to go
To find ideas that grow,
Let me know because I won’t refuse.